Cognitive Functioning: Bloody Brain Fog and Boredom

Why am I so fucking bored all the time?

In this episode, I talk about something I've really noticed since finding out I've got ADHD: how quickly I can lose interest when something isn't engaging to me.

I talk about sitting through boring conversations, my recent experience at a webinar where my brain basically checked out, and why it can feel almost impossible to keep listening when something just isn't interesting.

Then there's perimenopause and the brain fog. For me, it's a double whammy of boredom and struggling to process information. I can be interested and focused one minute, and the next I'm thinking, "What the fuck are you talking about?"

I talk about ADHD, boredom, attention, brain fog, cognitive functioning and the frustration of feeling like your brain just isn't cooperating.

I also share three simple strategies to try when you're struggling with boredom or brain fog:

Make boring things active.

Add stimulation where you can.

Reduce the cognitive load when your brain is foggy.

Because sometimes you're not lazy, you're not rude, and you don't not care.

Sometimes your brain is just saying, "This is fucking boring, and I can't process any more information today."

And honestly? I think we need to listen to that a little bit more.

Thanks for listening to The Shit Show.

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Find out more about InTune, the app designed to help women with ADHD understand what’s going on with their brain and hormones, and work out what they need today.

https://adhdmenopausehub.com/

Transcript

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Season one, Episode Five Cognitive Functioning, Bloody Brain Fog and Boredom. Because one of the things I've really noticed since finding out I've got ADHD is how quickly I get bored. And I don't mean mildly bored, I mean if something isn't interesting to me, my brain is like, Nope, we're out. And I have to say, I don't think I've always been quite this bad. I used to be able to sit through things that weren't particularly interesting. You know, you'd go to a meeting, you'd listen to somebody talk, you'd sit through a presentation, and you'd think, okay, this is a bit boring, but you'd just get on with it. Now I'm sitting there thinking, stop talking. This is so fucking boring. And I'm actually having to fight the urge to escape. I went to a webinar the other day and it started off really interesting. I was listening, I was engaged, I was thinking, Yep, this is interesting. I want to hear more about this. And then she started talking about a whole lot of boring stuff. And I could feel myself checking out. And I'm sitting there thinking, Oh my god. I am so bored. I want to get out of here. And it's almost like I've lost the ability to just sit there and go with it. I can't just think okay, this bit isn't particularly interesting, but I'll listen anyway. My brain is like, why are we still here? And I think that's really interesting, because I've started noticing that if something doesn't interest me, it is really fucking hard for me to pay attention to it. And I know I'm not the only person who experiences this. I've got another friend with ADHD and he's talked about exactly the same thing. He gets bored really easily. And when you start looking at the research around ADHD and boredom, there actually is an association there. People with ADHD tend to report higher levels of boredom proneness. And researchers have been looking at the relationship between boredom, attention control, and working memory. And that makes sense to me. Because boredom isn't necessarily just oh, this is boring. It's what happens to my attention when my brain isn't getting enough stimulation from what I'm doing. My brain starts looking for something else. Something more interesting. Something more stimulating. Something that I actually want to pay attention to. And that's where I think ADHD gets really interesting. Because I can sit for hours doing something that I am completely fascinated by. I can research something. I can go down a rabbit hole. I can listen to a podcast. I can read something. I can work on an idea. And suddenly I've got all the attention in the world. But put me in front of something that I find boring and it's like I've got no attention whatsoever. And then people can look at that and think, well, clearly you can concentrate. You just don't want to concentrate on this. And I'm like, yes. But that's actually the fucking point. I can concentrate when my brain is engaged. The problem is getting my brain to engage with something that it finds boring. And this is where I think the whole motivation thing gets misunderstood as well. Because people will say, You just need to be more disciplined. Just focus. Just pay attention. Just listen. And I'm sitting there thinking, I am trying. I am actually trying. But my brain is going, there is nothing interesting happening here. Let's go somewhere else. And then you've got perimenopause thrown into the mix. And for me, this is where it becomes a bit of a double whammy. Because it's not just that I'm bored, I'm also dealing with the brain fog. And the brain fog makes it harder for me to process information. So now I've got something that isn't particularly interesting to me. And my brain is already finding it harder to process the information. That's not a great combination. And cognitive problems during perimenopause are actually a recognized experience. Research has found that women can experience changes in things like verbal memory, attention, working memory, and processing speed during the menopause transition. And I think that's important because sometimes we can think, oh, I'm just getting old. What's wrong with me? Why can't I concentrate? Why can't I remember what somebody just said? Why am I having to read the same thing three times? And sometimes there can be multiple things happening at once. For me, it's like I've got ADHD and then I've got perimenopause coming along and going, Oh, let's just make your cognitive functioning a little bit more difficult as well. And I'm like, thanks. Really appreciate that. So I've got the boredom, I've got the brain fog, I've got the attention issues, and then I've got somebody sitting there talking to me about something that I don't give a shit about. And my brain is just gone. And I think this is where I've had to become much more honest with myself about what I can actually process. Because I don't want to sit here and pretend that I can just force myself through everything. Sometimes I can. Sometimes I absolutely have to sit through something that's boring. Sometimes that's life. We can't just walk out of every meeting because we're bored. We can't tell our boss sorry, you've lost me. This is boring. I'm off. Although sometimes I'd really like to. But I think there are things we can do to make it easier. And this is what I've been experimenting with myself. The first thing is if something is boring, I try to make it active. If I'm just sitting there listening to somebody talk, that's when I can really start to drift off. So instead of just listening, I'll take notes, I'll write down questions, I'll look for the three things that are actually relevant to me. I'll ask myself, what am I supposed to get from this? Because suddenly my brain has a job. I'm not just sitting there passively waiting for somebody else to entertain me. I'm actively processing what they're saying, and I think that can make a huge difference. The second thing is to add some kind of stimulation where you can. And I'm not saying sit there scrolling TikTok while somebody is talking to you. That's probably not going to help. But if you're doing something boring that doesn't require your visual attention, can you put some music on? Can you change the environment? Can you move around? Can you stand up? Something into a game. Can you give yourself a feeling? My brain needs more stimulation. Sometimes I need to give up making everything. My brain responds differently depending on how engaged I am. And you're not necessarily rude because you're struggling to listen to something that your brain isn't engaging with. There is actually a cognitive process happening underneath all of this. And for me, I think the biggest thing is understanding the difference between I don't want to do this and my brain is struggling to engage with this because they're not necessarily the same thing. If something is important to me and I'm still struggling to pay attention, that's information. If something is interesting and I can concentrate on it for hours, but I can't concentrate on something else for ten minutes, that's information too. And instead of beating myself up and saying, What is wrong with you? I can ask, what does my brain need right now? Do I need more stimulation? Do I need to move? Do I need to make this more active? Do I need to reduce the amount of information I'm processing? Do I need to take a break? Do I need to come back to this when my brain is actually functioning better? And sometimes the answer is Yes, I need to fucking leave. And that's okay too. But not every situation needs to be endured. If you've got the choice to leave something that is completely irrelevant to you, maybe leave. But if you can't leave, then make it active. Take notes. Ask questions. Find the interesting bit. Give your brain something to work with. And if you're dealing with brain fog as well, slow things down. Write things down. Break the information into smaller pieces. Don't expect yourself to hold everything in your head. And I think that's probably my biggest takeaway from this episode. Your brain isn't necessarily broken because you're bored. And your brain isn't necessarily broken because you're struggling to process information. Sometimes you've got ADHD, sometimes you've got perimenopause, sometimes you've got both, and sometimes you've just had a really shit night's sleep and your brain has had enough. So the three things I'd suggest you try are really simple. Number one, make boring things active. Take notes, ask questions, find something interesting in what you're listening to, and give your brain something to do. Number two, add stimulation where you can, change your environment, move around, put some music on when appropriate, or find a way of making the task more engaging. And number three, when you're experiencing brain fog, reduce the cognitive load. Don't try to process everything at once. Write things down, break information into smaller pieces, and give yourself more time to process it. Because sometimes it's not that you don't care. Sometimes it's not that you're lazy. Sometimes your brain is just saying, This is fucking boring, and I can't process any more information today. And honestly, I think we need to listen to that a little bit more. Take care, and I'll see you in the next episode.